Chapter 1 

A man is alone. He has a principle or two. He can't help but believe that the world is organized against him and against his principles. At the time the conspiratorial mind seemed a senile, demented one where holiness is turned into a fetish object but their master is not Christ or God or Buddha or Krishna but the collective image the cult has developed about itself.

"Oh world, I distrust you whether you are in the mundane workaday world or of the claims and supersititons that coem from every nook. A young man spends considerable energy investigating all the cliams from various sources, 95% prove to be useless nonsense or some half-ass power play. But then, I am a sociable sort."

"At the corner of youth I see walking in front of me obstruction, pettiness, ill-will, manipulation, stupidity, arrows of impunity. Memory of misunderstandings, I understand now!"

I noted all instances of failed individuality, all vulnerabilities to growth and development. The world can break a good brain down and make it a leaping dog biting invisible bones. It can make that dog chase its own tail around and around until it catches itself and eats itself piece by piece.

I was aware of the pathetic in myself.

David Eide
January 24, 2014