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[ESSAYS]

Meditations on the Not-Yet Realizable Goal.

We are ashamed of our audacity sometimes. Yet, when we connect with wisdom we have connected with all we need to know. In those weird years between the age of 25 and 30 I had experienced many hells and horrendous chasms brought on by the times, by private problems, by a fierce density that had clouded everything inside and out. Some great shakeout was occurring to people after the adrenaline years. All was blight. All was a threat against ones integrity.

It occurred to me, in an interesting place to think, that wisdom is the natural outcropping of failure, of disillusionment, of lost and broken dreams. Or, more precisely, at the moment we lose dreams, we are profoundly disillusioned and the world becomes a nasty sort of silence. It is at that point we seek wisdom.

It is the curative that keeps things upright. And this must be so because our dreams and aspirations are a pure vanity without which we believe life is a stupendous lie and hell-bore. "Ah, we have lost our dreams and aspirations; we are in the hell-world of disillusionment!" So, people plummet and don't want to face the odd reality that we are human animals in a universe we scarcely understand. in a life so confusing and complex. And then death waits for us. Another incomprehensible mystery. So, how is all of this resolved? By not resolving it trouble begins, sometimes trouble on a monumental scale.

We surrender, then, to the little pleasures and diversions which harm no one, not least ourselves. The heroism of youth dies but we admire it in others, in the young, in figures of history.

No one can explain wisdom. Only a few have actually embodied it as it is. Christ and Buddha, for instance.

Wisdom is mind at the end of exhaustion; the beginning of new energy.

Wisdom is nearly an embarrassment.


And what goal would there be? I think all the great spirits and mind have wrestled with this dilemma. What possible goal could there be but this: Continue to enrich the mind and push against the envelope until it opens. Therefore, it is not perfection that is needed but transformation' transcendence. There is a kind of trick that puts the soul in motion and, in motion, the possibility of its renewal exists.

When a goal has been attained it is the omnivorous self that goes after it. The irreconcilable battle ensues.Perfection implies that there is no real adventure when, in reality, it is an enormous adventure. There are two words for perfection: Boredom and Slavery.

If one were to live in the spirit of creation where would be the need for perfection?

When one thinks of the future one makes a decision between what is inexhaustible and what is finite. Are the objects surrounding us inexhaustible? The only way one could make the claim that objects are an inexhaustible source of vitality would be to say they have displaced what was once the inexhaustible vitality of the human soul. and if this is true are not the two fates similar? No doubt the fate of cars, atomic bombs, and all type of machines is of greater value than God, death, love and all the sources of mystery.

Wisdom is the giving up of power for a greater understanding of life. When wisdom has the power to coax a man out of his "will-to-power" then the wisdom is true or, at least, on the path to truth.

Modern men and women have abandoned the thought that "God is out there, beyond the sky and stars." But the modern person has not abandoned, perhaps is not even that aware of, the idea that God is within the person stretching out into that sky and star. If God stretches this way and yet we are not God what is our relation to God?

The knotty question arises, "Can this God tell us how to live, how we should live in these days?" "Well," someone asks, "what do you mean by living? Do you mean God will show you the best mortgage rates in some city you want to move to? Will God direct you to your truest love? Perhaps. But here is what God does. He is the artist that "releases the life already embedded in the stone," as Michelangelo was quoted as saying about his sculpture. And once God has done this we are free in a painful sort of way."

The poet handles wisdom very carefully. Brothers have died in their mishandling of it. A man puts his wisdom on his shoulder to get it whacked off.

Wisdom for a master like Christ is pure sacrifice. We, the lesser types, sacrifice the world of artifact and gain incredible riches as a result.

But then we are always on the verge of asking, "what is the wisdom of a bureacracy or a corporation or a baseball team? What is the wisdom of commute traffic?" And the truth is that wisdom can very definitely penetrate these areas especially as human beings are involved. But wisdom can only win out in the human soul, it can't always become public policy, especially in a good, healthy secular culture as this one attempts to be from time to time. Not lately perhaps.

The problem for wisdom is that it is not reproducible like a scientific product. It is a unique quality for each individual person. People who do not cultivate wisdom and live life with pure instincts always are startled when they come across one who has cultivated wisdom. "Ah, why couldn't I just buy this in the store? Why don't they have a mailbox number or website where I can order some of this wisdom?" No, first there has to be a felt need for it. And that comes in many forms. First, the need and then the discovery through arduous work. The dark night of the soul occurs

approx. 900 words put


PRAISES

God, liberator from the guile and stupidity of others, God is the praiseworthy eternity without which we flounder unforgiven, unloved, undone by our own vanity.

God, freer of ridiculous ideas that end up massacring millions of the innocent; freer of even His own followers.

God, who begins in thunder and ends a still and crystal stream of quiet transmissions in the quiet of thunderous nights, when the business of life is too much and we are on the verge of the collapsing temples we have made for ourselves.

God does not burst in like an invading army but seduces us with truth and vision.

God is the resuscitation of spirit.

God is the restorative.

God is the only trustworthy force in life. The only one that is always there, now in the background, now in the foreground.

All generations change but God is constant.

God protects us from the annual, monthly, weekly, and daily humiliations that puts us through the shredder and destroys our wholeness.

God shows us what idiots we are without demoralizing us.

God takes a soft brain and makes it supple.

God takes a hard brain and makes it supple.

Ripeness of brain is one of the goals of God

Those who don't know God punish others, then themselves. The punishment of self is the unkindest cut of all.

God teaches that there is no loss in helping others.

God teaches that Time belongs to God alone and those who know this enter the sublime truths of Time.

Science explains the facts pretty well. It describes the universe in precise mathematics. It advances and pushes the envelope back on every field of knowledge. However, it does not teach us anything about what to do with the facts. And it does not have the property of transforming the human spirit. He who knows science and respects it as well as allows for the transformative spirit of God into his soul is the man nature wants to produce.

With God human beings could live relatively well without science. Despite how aghast we are by the conditions humans lived in previously to science, they did live and accomplish enormous things. Human beings could live with science alone if he were prepared to destroy and be destroyed in an inhuman parody of God-likeness.

God does not lead men and women to power. God teaches men and women how to let go of power.

God convinces us that what is easy to come by is easy to go. It is a stab through the heart than does some character surgery.

God says we are here to live well and with wisdom but that we must spend a few months in Hell.

Men have proven the indestructibility of God by creating and destroying gods through time. Friday, October 13, 2006

God gives us art and joy; wisdom and excitement that life is good and what one thought it was in his native youth.

God scrutinizes, men love.

God does not produce dull stories.

Gods beauty is a reflection of man's ugliness. God is necessary as long as men wear the skin of his ugly spirit.

Oh willful God, caretaker of poets and generous with mind and spirit, take away the stink of the human animal.

God punishes every soul that misjudges and give pain to the poet.

Monday, October 23, 2006

God allows us to let go when we've been cheated and defrauded of hard-earned money.

God curses those who have cheated and defrauded us.

God says, let go.

God frees us from those who know and want us to know just as they know. The non-knowers!

November 21, 2007

God protects us when people interpret the good things we do as bad.

God is a Tree that protects us from the noxious fumes of the world.

God, reduced to a concept, is a mere plaything in the hands of men and women. "Ah, this is all you want from me," God says. "Ok, I will only be your plaything and you will not derive any of my benefits."

Science may bring us a "better life" but God teaches how to enjoy it.

Without God we are nothing but fragile machines destined to be replaced and destroyed without pity.

God rushes into the deserts of our mind and fills it with fresh water.

God is a creative element not a controlling one.

God frees us from control.

God is a test that leads us into the future.

The universe is a lifeless thing, constructed by dull chemicals and numbers. If it is that then that is exactly what you will get in your life, nothing more, nothing less. The chemicals and numbers will come and take you away into some lost region of self and put you on a high ridge. Nothing will rescue you. The faith in God, in an mysterious and scarcely believable way, rearranges the vast universe and makes it real.

If this doesn't prove God created the universe it proves that God, in men, can change the perception of even a vast thing like the universe. And what is this power?

Who do I trust? A man with a few ideas, a man who has thoughts because of drugs or alcohol, a man who abuses, a man or woman who merely manipulates or one who creates a perfect, transparent system of belief, the end of which is the full liberation of the human being? And if I trust this man, don't I trust his words? And if I trust his words and he says that life exists after death isn't that greater than all the nay-saying available any given time?

Men who kill, steal, lie, and other common behavior of, even, believers; men who do these things as "men of God," have failed one of the prime commandments: "Do not judge....." This statement is large with sublime truth. "Do not judge," because the judgement is merely a projection of yourself, out into "something" you want to control. And in truth, you want to control yourself. Do not judge," also means, trust life. Trust that life works itself out for the good. Let go. Let people be who they are. Protect yourself and move on if that is needed.

What is manifested? Atomic bombs? Sad, anonymous lives? Destructive rages? Purposeless chasing after pleasure? Or, creativity? Light? Joy and happiness?

Two types to avoid: those who try to cram God down your throat and those who utterly deny God in their life.

God is a kind of necessity that finds its way into the self when you least expect it. Listen! Listen and let that voice fall deeply into your heart.

One can never blame human beings for building magnificent structures around their belief or faith. How else could be it be transmitted? But faith is tested when the structures fall down, when they are no more, when, in fact, the individual must find a way to build his own structure, through his own experience of faith. That is the mighty test, especially in this skeptical age.

Modern persons are conflicted on the fact that God is easily rolled over by technology. Do modern person ever reflect on what technology really is? It's never a zero-sum game. We are the victims of our own illusions, our own ignorance because we simply compare what we have to what they had in the past. And yet our own vaunted time will be passed over quickly as the future finds its own technology, its own systems. Is there no greater need of God than when the spirit understands that time rejects all? If not rejecting, then certainly devouring........

And where does technology come from but a seed, a creative seed in the mind of some man or woman? And is this seed neutral? Is this seed without origin? Is this seed innocent? I don't think so.

No doubt men and women can live without God. However they are dependent on a great deal of history in which God played a major role. And if they deny God, then they forfeit any claim to the future. And this is one reason why God is eternal.

When we are down, when life has us by the testicles, when all is flat and bleak it is God that rescues us, not the theory, not the idea, not the abstraction, not the institution, not even the family but God and God alone. When the deniers see this they always wish for death.

God is a secret to Time. Without God Time is a nihilist and wipes us out in short order. So, what do we do? Surrender to the worst in ourselves! God's grace opens up time and permits a kind of effusive grandeur utterly impossible when God is denied to us.

The world is ugly, the world is perverse, no question. It can be that at times. So what do the unfaithful do about it? What is their solution? They have none and so remain silent or go titillate themselves because there is no out.

Faith is discovery. It is not imposed. This is an important point to keep in mind. Faith discovers it's raison' d et the more the soul moves forward. Pity those who do not know this adventure! Their boring escapades are only memorable in terms of faith.

Monday, December 25, 2006

God shows us in the dim morning what and who we truly are.

Everything fails but then God is eternal and is always there full and laughing and encouraging us to laugh with Him.

God is the alignment that makes the being work at its optimum.

It is worth noting that people can get along without God, can flourish and do quite well, can remain without problems all their lives but they do not lift a finger for another person. They do not look and comprehend the world with any urgency. They surround themselves with fabrications. They talk about their fabrications as if they are real. They stimulate themselves in a variety of ways when their energy is depleted. They become addicted and so, one can say, they have fabricated their own Hell.

People, including the philosophers, believe that not-belief in God will release great amounts of energy but they forget that God is the source of energy, including thought and creative energy. A world of purely men and women believing they are the gods would resemble a world without birds or air or fish or trees. A world deprived of all life and energy. A world of the damned, the insane asylum and so on. When philosophers argue or deny God they are, sometimes correctly, moving their arguments into a safer place, where conversation can take place.

But then, what to do with the endless followers!

Followers of God, followers of philosophers, followers of the powerful----- it's endless. And doesn't God want simply the full manifestation of a man or woman who has utterly no dependence on anything that one can see? No string that leads to his mind or spirit back to someone or something else?

Monday, January 08, 2007

God is the irrationality that meets the irrationality of the world on an eternal battlefield.

God is that eternal energy that can not be created or destroyed only transformed. As we have seen in our own time the energy can be transformed into nuclear weapons, cloning and certainly technical/ scientific arrogance that believes, as those who sailed on the Titanic, that an impenetrable, unsinkable world is being created.

Without God, the weight of the world is great.

It is a world of nightmares and pleasant illusions.

It is a world of vast manipulations, way beyond what occurred in the past. A world of endless humiliation and degradation.

The problem is that there is no going back. so the self either finds God or not. If a self doesn't find God then he must take responsibility for knowing the world so well, so deeply that every form of manipulation, humiliation, and degradation would vanish, at least in his or her own life.

But every person is manipulated by what he or she has surrendered to be it pure skepticism, objects of convenience, or money and the goods in life.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Psychology is that powerful tool that got into the hands of power hungry type or a more foolish type; he or she who believes we have transcended time. In that sense it resembles Marxism and will be discarded eventually but for the philosophers. Psychology is a wonderful base for philosophy and literary discovery. But spiritual faith is the only thing that has come around to free us; not to be empty pieces of air but to live out our real substance.

What we don't know controls us, controls us. That's a modern axiom and is used a variety of ways. But God is that objective there-ness that simply extinguishes what controls us without condition. It is in us and not us. Christ points to it but, in Himself, as He always said is not Him. Through Him you will reach the true God.

God is that power that absorbs all projection with aplomb.

God of insights into what we most love, fear, and hate; mainly, ourselves!

God, even destroyer of the ill-will and hate in families, is the only love permissable in the evil world.

If belief in God destroys a certain cachet among political or cultural groups destroy your loyalty with the political or cultural groups. They want nothing but ill-will to happen.

God is something found in life because all other roads have been blocked by the evil of the world. Yet, belief itself is not enough as Christ knew. Beyond belief is the will-to-power, the will-to-wreak revenge and so on.

God is not verifiable, in the scientific sense, but neither is beauty. It is. It is because without it men and women die. They are eaten up by a life they can not fend off. I would rather have Beethoven around then a technician at ITT or a thousand of them.

To say that God can not be verified, therefore God does not exist is saying that no matter how much technique we apply to Mr. Smith, composer, we can not make him Beethoven, therefore Beethoven must be an impossiblity.

God only exists to those who make a difference and those are both good and evil. This is the essential drama, even today.

My faith protects me against both believers and non-believers. The non-believer is usally filled with modern supersittions born out of science, technology, and captial. They believe that their non-believe gives them extra energy they would have wasted in belief. In reality they are simply burning up their last hope. They evenutally run down to the unprotected self.

I am protected but I don't judge. My faith is not dependent on what others may or may not believe. It was not forced, therefore it was invited in. Once invited in it became large, a treasure trove, as well as a posse of good entites to head off the bad guys.

These conflicts between "God" and "science" or "belief in God" and "humanism" and so forth are dealt with by amatuers, inexpereinced, ignorant and others who are privlidged to live in America and add nothing positive to it. But, we judge too much.

The goal of God is to make men more and more "themselves" as they truly are. Seperation comes and the spirit is split.

The Bible is the most profound book of growth snd development available. There is wisdom at every turn. Whether it was God or the poets who wrote it is irrevelant. Praise!

Seperation comes, the spirit is split and we are forced to ride down a divided highway until, finally, we cry out in pain.

Pain is the inner cry that something is not right. That we must align and adjust towards what nature intended us to be. If we have no ability to name what that is to be then what? Don't we just bloat into infinity? There must be a compelling sense of what God intends human beings to be. Even here in Spring of 2007. It never ends.

God contains both passion and the rational. Passion to drive us into challenges. The rational to see and gain perspective. Both are put out into the enviroment in one form or the other but the two qualities are always with us, as human beings, and need to be developed and born again.

Tuesday, April 3, 2007

In dealing with this binder you must do some things. One is to organize the material better. Study it and give it some structure. What is the angle of attack? Yes, it is a meditation on the spiritual wisdom but it is from the point of view of the poetic consciousness and not anything else. It is not philosophical discourse necessarily. It is a description of the reception of wisdom, the movement of wisdom in the self. Deal with this through 2006 Things to do:

  • Go to the writing life and put on material from that
  • at 10,000 start to organize it. Not sure how.
  • Make it poetry and not pious prose.
  • Perhaps God is a loaded term -- but God always means to me, revelation and so change and dynamism.
Word Count: 2760

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David Eide
eide491@earthlink.net 
© 2007 David Eide. All rights reserved.