Chapter 1 

When I saw some splendor I thought to myself, “if they knew I was here they would be very envious,’ then the thought passed as I really didn’t know where here was. “If it’s a dream I will be waking soon,” but I had tested myself in the vacuum of it to see if it was merely a dream and it was not because I grasped myself whole and as I was and fully aware of dreams where I had zoomed out into space to meet awful beings and been scared and trapped until I opened my eyes and realized I hadn’t gone anywhere. I had either been chosen randomly for some test or God was real and putting me through the paces to make a report of some kind, to provide at the very least who was the most powerful dude around. And I went back and forth with God. At first it was what they said it was, then it was a tale told to keep the people down, then it was a desperate tale told by poets who needed leverage against the kings and merchants, then it was pure sociology, then the apotheoisis of limitation, then I kind of fell apart and understood God as substance that keeps us upright, eyes forward into the horizon, in us, in us regardless if the universe and stars were one thing or the other, in us whether we were of this universe or the next one or a further one, as much a part of us as a lung or toe or pubic bone.

No, they would be jealous and throw away whatever life they had lived and start something new, I couldn’t say what exactly. I liked to think about it, their new life that is after they understood the nature of things. “It would be a good day for them to release their silliness and live in the honorable knowledge of all this splendor.” So I had been the dreamer. And now I didn’t know whether I was the first man or last man or even if my mission was for good or for bad. After all, I often got the impression that whatever I learned was going to be used against my pals down on Earth, to hook them into something against their will I couldn’t say. And I was no traitor against my species. If some force had demanded to know how to destroy my brothers and sisters I would have spit in its face and taken my punishment. I didn’t sell out my species.

David Eide
January 24, 2014